Update: Absences, apologies, and economy rants.

First things first, I am so sorry. I am so deeply sorry for my absence lately. It's been too long and I am so sorry for not being here, for not reading your comments, for not caring. There is no real excuse but there is reason. And it has kept me not only from caring about things I am passionate about like feminism, equality and you. It has also kept me from wanting to share with you where I have been and what I have been doing. Truthfully, I have felt like I was doing nothing. But you see, the truth is, I am in the same situation as millions of people across the world right now. I am job searching and doing anything and everything I can not to lose every shred of purpose I once thought I possessed. And in the last few years, I have faultered, completely and in the process completely shut off from those of you who took the time to read my posts and cared about what I had to say, and what I felt. And now having wandered back onto my site I want you to know that whoever you are, know matter how many or how few, you have uplifted me and for that I am truly grateful. I wonder, are any of you dealing with this? Are any of you struggling to find work, dealing with subsequent depression? If so, I want nothing more than to make you feel as... un-alone as you have made me feel now, and to say that no matter how hard it may be and how unworthy of you I may feel, that I will try everything I can to never let my struggles lead away from you again. Just keep letting me know you are out there. Let me know you are out there, wherever you are, and let me know how YOU feel. We can feel it all together, rather than being ashamed alone.

Shameless Self-Promotion- Some words from me on Disability, Accessibility, and Inequality...

 

Thanks to Mitch Thompson for shooting the video.

Sexy Saturdays- Diana's Diary and embracing Pornography

I have a dirty little confession to make: one of my favorite things to do is skim the shelves of the bookstore with my friends looking for the latest in high quality Pornography Literature. And, you know it has taken me quite sometime to decide whether or not to tell you that and the thought crossed my mind, "Why on earth would I hesitate to share that?". After thinking about it for a while I realized it wasn't my mistake or shame over pornography, or at least it wasn't JUST mine our society has somehow declared that pornography is for women to either be in for men, or for men to watch, even though for men porn rarely comes without shame. The other thing I realized is that its in everything to do with pornography or any works about sex, even within the works themselves. The first issue I wanted to bring up was something I didn't even realize until I read one. Pornography is not even referred to as pornography there is this new, easier word,"Erotica". I will NEVER be using that word on this blog. Erotica is cowardly. Erotica is for people who don't want to admit that they like porn, who are ashamed to admit that they like pornography, that they get off on pornography. It applies to men and to women as well, the shame applied to porn is universal and a great shame. Let me say it a couple more times because it really just feels good, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, Try it! My second issue does apply specifically to women, the way women's bodies are referred to in porn lit as apposed to how men's bodies are. i had no idea that my vagina was actually "my sex" or my "lips" and my personal favorite "my flower" while mens penis's are their rock hard "cocks" and, well, "penises" thats right for some reason it's okay to acknowledge when a man is engaging in activity using their private parts but a woman's sexual activity must be hidden behind cheesy euphemisms. So I would like you to know that while I am opening up my latest porn lit, Diana: A diary in the second person, I feel great and completely guilt free and I hope that next time you open yours or turn on your video or open your next issue of playgirl, or indeed boy, that you will feel nothing but pure pleasure as you feel that familiar satisfaction and that equally familiar feeling between your "sex" as it were [god I'm embarrassed to even say it sarcastically] I hope that all you'll feel is pure pleasure... and perhaps an enjoyable tinge of reckless abandon.

Feminist Fridays- Rape in America at its lowest since 80's

Though reports of rape are still extremely high in America they have dipped to its lowest since 1989. USA Today reports that FBI data shows this dip and has released this diagram:

According to the FBI's other estimations 89, 000 women reported being raped in 2008, thats 29 women for every 100,000 people. Thats down from a high of 109,062 reported rapes in 1992-- thats 43 women for every 100,000 people. This is positive but we should celebrate cautiously as the data for 2009 has not been released. There is technology now that make things undeniably better like the fact that every hospital now carries rape kits which make it easier to collect an attackers DNA. Though some of the reasons that the USA today gave for this low rate of rape was a little questionable. For instance, these are only an estimation of reported rapes, we don't know how many that go unreported. They also claim that victim blaming doesn't occur anymore, so sooooo far from the truth. Michael Males, senior researcher for the Center on Juvenile & Criminal Justice in San Francisco tried to make the claim,"you don't see the nightmarish trials of the 1960s where a woman's reputation would be brought into question and people would conclude she deserved it." We do see victim-blaming almost every time a new case is reported. However, we cannot deny that any kind of data proving a decline in violence against women is a victory making a perfect and welcome addition to Feminist Fridays.

Theatre Thursdays- Away We Go

So I know that this weeks movie has been reviewed to death on feminist blogs but I can't resist it. I recently got the chance to see "Away We Go" and was very touched. It is about an unmarried couple expecting a child and they decide that since Bert's [John Krasinski] parents announce that they are moving thousands of miles away and that money is too tight to stay where they are that he and Verona [Maya Rudolph] should go traveling to visit some friends and family to find their new families "Perfect Home". On the way they visit Verona's old boss, played hilariously by Allison Janney, Burt's cousin, played to perfection by Maggie Gyllenhaal, the over sensitive feminist professor who refuses to sleep apart from her children or even push them in a stroller so as not to cause them "separation issues". The cast is impeccable ending with them finding their perfect home in a very surprising, yet perfect place. The movie is not without its flaws Gyllenhaal's feminist mom though hilarious does on occasion come off as slightly condescending and it is sometimes unclear whether writers Dave Eggers and Vendela Vida were trying to make an offbeat comedy or a straight drama but nevertheless, the scene when Burt and Verona make promises to one another and Burt turns to Verona and says, "promise me to let our daughter be fat or skinny or whatever weight she wants to be because we just want her to be happy and because being obsessed with her weight is just too cliche for our daughter.." sealed it for me. This movie is a great step in the right direction for female characters and the messages for young girls in the film industry.

Tasty Tuesday- Walnut Risotto with Brown Butter and Romano Crustini

This was a very delicious and beautiful dish that I made for my best friend's birthday. We were thrilled that it turned out so well and we recommend pouring a rich glass of red wine to go with it.

225g unsalted Butter 

2 Shallots, finely chopped 

3 cloves Garlic, crushed

250g Risotto

4tbsp Dry White Wine

750ml good vegetable stock, hot

75g Walnuts, coarsely chopped

50g Watercress Leaves

1/2 small crusty baguette, cut into 5mm thick slices

100g Romano Cheese, thinly sliced

40g unsalted butter 

Salt and Pepper to taste

Heat the butter in a heavy based pan over a moderate heat, add the shallots and garlic and cook for 1 minute until softened but not colored. Add the rice and stir until well coated with the butter. Pour over the white wine and stir until it has been absorbed. Over a moderate heat, add the hot vegetable stock a ladleful at a time, only adding one more once each quantity has been absorbed. The rice should be just tender, but still retain a bite when its cooked- this should take about 25 minutes in all. Add the Walnuts and Watercress after that. Toast the bread until golden on both sides. Transfer the rice deep serving bowls. Top each risotto with bread slices then drape the Romano over top. In a small frying pan heat butter until it foams, becomes nutty in fragrance and turns hazelnut in color. Quickly spoon over the cheese and leave for 30 seconds to allow the cheese to soften before serving.

Meddling Mondays-Tragic Mass Rape in Guinea

Soldiers in Guinea attacked a number of unarmed civilians at a political demonstration in a stadium. Reports and photos taken by the civilians on their cellphones of the attack have continued to surface but their has been very little other coverage. However, last weeks New York Times has a horrifying account of what occurred in their stadium that day:

I can't sleep at night, after what I saw," said one middle-aged woman from an established family here, who said she had been beaten and sexually molested. "And I am afraid. I saw lots of women raped, and lots of dead."

One photograph shows a naked woman lying on muddy ground, her legs up in the air, a man in military fatigues in front of her. In a second picture a soldier in a red beret is pulling the clothes off a distraught-looking woman half-lying, half-sitting on muddy ground. In a third a mostly nude woman lying on the ground is pulling on her trousers. [...]

The exact number of women who were abused is not known. Because of the shame associated with sexual violence in this West African country, victims are reluctant to speak, and local doctors refuse to do so. Victims who told of the attacks would not provide their names because they were afraid of retribution.

But the witnesses were adamant. "I affirm, in categorical fashion, that women were raped, not just one woman," said Mamadou Mouctar Diallo, 34, an opposition leader who said he had been severely beaten himself. "I saw many rapes."  [...]

"They especially tore into the women," said another former prime minister, François Lonsény Fall, who was also at the stadium. "They were seeking to humiliate them."

The U.S. government has called on Guinean leaders to ensure the safety of the people, but by all accounts the ruling military are where the blame for this violence should be placed. Amnesty International has stepped up to ask for, "An immediate halt to all supplies of security and police equiptment to the Guinean government until it has taken practical steps to prevent violations by the security forces and has brought those responsible for Monday's acts to justice."