First of all, I am so so so so so sorry for how unforgivably long it has taken me to write this weeks post, well I am going to write them all tonight. I only wish I had a good excuse like school has been crazy or I had some sort of dyer personal issue, but, alas, it wasn't I just didn't feel like it the first couple of days and then by the time I did I was so behind that I made myself overwhelmed.
Also, even though I personally am dying for today's Sexy Saturday I'm also a bit worried because I'm usually trying to give you advice on places you can go for toys or techniques for how to spice things up, but, today I'm just feeling a bit too...political.
I have been really disheartened lately by some of the ways girls in our society have been in a way, passive aggressively shaming other women who may not express themselves sexually in the same way that they do. Especially since [and okay this may only be my perspective] it seems that the only reason a lot of girls today express their sexuality is for the pleasure and titillation of men, so to shame other women for what they do seems, well, a tad... like raging HYPOCRISY. An example would probably help so I'll tell you that this whole thing got started when I was reading some interview with a female celebrity. [I wouldn't want to mention them by name because I think it would make the reactions bias and less effective and more based on her momentary popularity then her comments] She has used her sexuality and her beauty so transparently talking about her sex life with her boyfriend and how she likes to have sex 24/7 and date a woman and, blah, blah, blah, a whole barrage of other statements catering unashamedly to any and every male fantasy possible. To be honest though while I rolled my eyes at them those comments didn't really offend me so much, partly because they were mostly said in a really silly way and I didn't feel they would be taken that seriously anyhow, and partly because, well, regardless of whether she was using her sexuality to please men and validate herself she was using it also to acquire power and, well fame and attention and good for her for using the powers at her disposal to get what she wants, right? A few weeks ago however she was in another interview talking about how even though she loved sex she wasn't a slut because she only has sex with her committed boyfriend and, "one-night stands make her sick".[*breathes deeply to keep composure*] Okay, let me make this abundantly clear to any and every one out their, THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH SAFE ONE-NIGHT STANDS!!!!!!!!!! WOMEN WHO HAVE ONE-NIGHT STANDS ARE NOT SLUTS, OR WHORES, OR EVEN PROMISCUOUS OR EVEN LESS MORAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Those who think this misconception to be true need to get it into their heads that there are many forms of empowerment. If said celebrity female does not feel good about having a one night stand, then, yes, her not having one IS empowering for her, and me having one because I do feel good about it is also empowering. The least empowering and most pointless thing to do is for us to hurt each other or pass judgement on each other just because we choose to live our lives differently from one another. I cant stress this enough, one should always have the liberty to choose how they conduct themselves sexually free from shame, ridicule or judgement. You do what feels right for you and no one else, and the only persons judgement that you need to be concerned with is your own.
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